Week Thirteen: Kathy Benson


How old where you when you had your first kiss?

If I recall correctly, my memory is fuzzy, I think I had my first kiss when I was about ten years old.

It was summertime and I had spent many days hanging out with some neighborhood friends. I grew to have a crush on a boy that lived on a nearby block. The boy and I didn’t go to the same school, as the street I lived on bordered two towns. My family lived on the south side, which is Evanston, and the north side is Wilmette. The boy lived on a street on the Wilmette side and thus it was exciting to get to know someone that I didn’t see much during the school year.

I liked being with this boy. He was nice and cute. I suppose we flirted as much as grade school kids do. I don’t remember thinking much about wanting to kiss him or anyone for that matter. But one day we ended up playing “spin the bottle” with his older brother and some other neighborhood friends. During the game one of us spun the bottle (I don’t remember if it was the boy or me) and we “had to kiss.” I was happy that I got to kiss the boy. But it was weird to have to do it in front of the other kids. It was a closed mouth kiss, however I think we were told that we had to “hold the kiss” for a set amount of time, maybe 5 or 10 seconds. So I have a vague memory of the other kids counting while we locked lips, which was bizarre and also sort of exciting.

I don’t believe the boy and I ever kissed again. I think I was disappointed about that, as I really liked him, as much as a ten year old can. But life goes on and eventually I met other boys in junior high, high school and college. I didn’t do very much kissing in junior high and high school. When I think about it I can count on one hand the number of boys that I kissed during those years, this was in part because I didn’t date much and when I did have a boyfriend, our relationship usually didn’t last long. I was too picky and tended to only want to go out with guys that weren’t interested in me and vice versa. When I think back there are a few young men who were interested in me that I regret not giving a chance to see if we could have been a good match.

In college I had fun dating and kissing more than I had in the past. I learned a lot about myself, as well as what I was looking for in someone that I might want to marry someday, through these relationships.

I met my husband at the beginning of our senior year in college. We were friends for about a month before our first kiss, which turned out to be my last first kiss. I still vividly remember kissing Bob for the first time. It wasn’t the best or most romantic kiss I’d ever experienced, but there was definitely something special about our connection. Sixteen years later and after twelve years of marriage, I feel very blessed and grateful to get to kiss Bob every day. Bob and I have had many romantic and memorable kisses over the years, including the one pictured above on our wedding day in September 2000.

What do you remember about your first or most memorable kiss?


Kathy Benson is a bereaved and blessed mom, writer and group fitness instructor trying to live mindfully and find joy in the journey after dealing with secondary infertility and loss for five years. She lives in Chicago, Illinois with her husband and two living children.

Kathy blogs at Bereaved and Blessed. You can also follow Kathy on Twitter @BereavedBlessed and her Facebook page.



2 thoughts on “Week Thirteen: Kathy Benson

  1. Pingback: Catching Up & Thursday’s Voice: October

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