Week Thirty-four: Amanda Kasper

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At what age did you become an adult?

… part of growing up is learning how to deal with difficult issues, and the benefits can be great if you have the courage to ask for help…

 Human beings are not designed to go through life alone. No one has to bear the burden of the tough times all by themselves.

[twloha]

Some would argue that I became an adult shortly after I was born. I was quick to walk and talk and to read and write and I wanted to know everything and do everything and be everything every moment I grew up.

I think I became an adult on December 15th, 2000, at age 14, when my skating coach, my parent, my mentor died suddenly in his sleep at just 49 years old. It’s been 12 years since then, and I can still tell you what I was wearing, how my mom told me, where she pulled off the road after picking me up from school. It was the night of our holiday recital at the rink, and I still wanted to go. I needed to go. To be with all of the people who knew him, who understood.

What I saw and felt and heard that night was way more than I bargained for. It was when I understood that death was permanent. In more ways than one, my life changed that night… but in foreshadowing next weeks prompt, I won’t go into any more detail.

Within months of that night, my parent’s marriage slowly began opening wounds and by September 11th, 2001, we all knew there was no closing to be done. My dad moved out December 1st of that year, and living the life of a divorced child, of two parents having conversations with you, at age 16, as a peer – that to me is honestly maybe when I understood what being an adult meant.

Ten years later, and I truly believe that each influential life experience I’ve had has made me more of an adult. Or maybe its just that they have shaped my personality, my opinions, my outlook on my life, who I am. I think we each become an adult in different moments. Sometimes, for some, it happens slowly and overtime.

For others it’s abrupt.

It’s one moment in time.

When did you realize you were an adult? 

____________________

Amanda Kasper is a writer, reader, quote lover, CASA advocate, and non-profit believer, seeking space as a lifelong learner, passionate lover, and irreplaceable friend. Amanda tweets at @AKasper513 and blogs over at “& this I believe”

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