Week Thirty-eight: Amanda Kasper

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When was the last time you were nervous?

“We’re scared of the strangest things, yet we regret them with

 more shame, blame, fame, we’re insane. When all we need is to think,

try, reach, love, lift up, and so is it so hard just to let go

& know you’re better off living inside out.

-Inside Out; Katie Costello

One minute ago? One hour ago? One day ago? In my life, it seems like there’s always something to be nervous about. And, I tend to be the nervous type.

Will she like me? Will I be wearing the right thing? Will I arrive on time? Will eating this, doing this, going there, make me feel better, or worse?

My 2013 question to live by is “is this right for me?” and each time I make a decision, I’m nervous. No matter how large or how small the question, I always feel the flutter in my stomach, worrying that I’ve missed something or that I’ve failed to consider all options or that I’m not as prepared as I could be.

I’m a fairly type A person, with a high level of organization, list making and procedures by which best I function. When things go astray, or new things appear, I get nervous. Will I be able to adjust?

The answer is almost always yes, but I never give myself enough credit beforehand. This is the most important lesson I hope to learn during the year.

____________________

Amanda Kasper is a writer, reader, quote lover, CASA advocate, and non-profit believer, seeking space as a lifelong learner, passionate lover, and irreplaceable friend. Amanda tweets at @AKasper513 and blogs over at “& this I believe”

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